Grindr has made dating easy for many people around the wold as millions can sign up and find potential partners for friendship, relationships or even sex. However, Grindr has been used as a tool by some to blackmail and harass members of the LGBT community in different parts of Africa. Many countries across the continent have criminalised same-sex relationships so some individuals and even law enforcement agents have used the app as a means to lure unsuspecting people in the LGBT community. Last year, Grindr put out a safety warning for Nigeria because of how bad things had gotten for individuals in the community who use the app to not only date but find love. Just a few days ago, reports surfaced about a man in the United States of America who used the app to kill a gay man.
To this end, we have decided to put out some safety tips on how to use Grindr (and other dating apps) especially in countries across Africa that criminalise consensual same sex relations.
Avoid using your picture
This is really hard because a picture increases your chance of meeting someone. However, it is best to use an avatar or a picture that is taken from an angle that will make you unrecongnisable. The argument that most people advance is that anyone that sees your picture on Grindr is possibly queer. Still, it is best to conceal your identity for cases when you meet someone and you can spot that they look suspicious – you can easily slip away without them knowing you were there in the first place. It is important to add here that you should not completely trust all the pictures that you see on the app.
Don’t reveal everything about yourself on the app
One of the frequent questions people ask on the app is “tell me about yourself.” Ensure you don’t reveal too much information when answering this question to protect your identity. You can say “I am Tom, 25, Work in the finance industry and I love pop culture.” That is enough to keep a conversation going instead of saying everything and anything. Also, don’t be in a rush to share your phone numbers or social media handles. While they are good ways to verify who you speaking with, you need to be very careful and trust your gut in these situations. Grindr recommends using a service like Google Voice or Line2 if you would want to take the conversation outside the app. It allows you to give people a second number and block them easily.
First meetings should be in a public place during the day
It is easy to want to invite someone from Grindr to your hotel room especially if you are in a new city. It is very convenient and it offers the privacy for conversation and sex. However, always try to have your first meetings in a public place and make sure it is not at night. You can choose a mall that is close to you and has lots of activity. This can help a quick getaway in case you need it. Also, when meeting with someone on the app for the first time, avoid going with sensitive documents and bank cards. Come out with an estimate of the cash you might need and set your Uber to take card trips so you can easily request a ride if you lose all your money. Remember to let someone know where you will be (and if possible, who you are meeting up with).
Don’t be afraid to block
Do not be afraid to use the block button when the conversation starts to take a weird turn. The good thing is when you block someone on Grindr, they lose all the information they have of you (unless they took screenshots). Still, never hesitate to use the block button to give yourself peace of mind.
Trust your gut
This is a bit ambiguous and very Oliva Pope but your gut is never wrong. If you feel weird about meeting someone, then don’t meet them. Your safety is important and you are in charge of your safety. In countries where same-sex relations are criminalised, it will be hard to get law enforcement agents to investigate any forms of harassment or blackmail. Don’t be scared to trust your gut.
Know the NGOs who work with the LGBT community in that city
A lot of these NGOs have helplines that are dedicated to assisting community members who get caught up in blackmail, assault or harassment cases from dating apps. Some of them might even know how to get the law enforcement agents to help with your case so it is good to have an idea who they are. Get their numbers or social media handles in case of any emergencies.
We would like to add that the purpose of this article is not to scare you. We also do not want to dictate how you should use your social media apps. However, we would like that you take precautions when using the apps so you can be safe. Also, don’t let anyone rush you into meeting or doing anything you don’t want to do. The hope is that times change and community members can feel safe when they use dating apps across the continent.
Are you on Grindr or any other dating apps? What safety precautions do you take when you use them? Please share with us in the comment section below.
