On Monday, 3rd of August, 2020, Nigerian singer, Simi apologised to the LGBTQ community for a comment she made during her YouTube show, ‘Stoopid Sessions’ a few months ago.
— Simi (@SympLySimi) August 3, 2020
‘Stoopid Sessions’, which made its debut in February, is a personal vlog by the singer where she addresses various issues confronting the everyday Nigerian. Simi and her guests: Sess, Kiekie, and Iyanuoluwa shared their views on several topics that ranged from dating to sexual preferences. In a now-deleted episode that was supposed to tackle the topic of dating among millennials, she shared her views on homosexuality.
“They (the gay community) say they’re born that way, but I haven’t seen any biological proof,” she had said during the episode of her show.
Her remarks drew widespread criticism from different people, activists and individuals on social media and it is no surprise that the apology was not well received from all in the community. Many criticized the fact that it took the death of someone in the community for her to acknowledge the issues the community faces and the impact that homophobia has on LGBT+ Nigerians. Adekunle Gold, who is also her husband felt the heat from the backlash with QUAZAR Magazine pulling Adekunle Gold from their recent campaign.
Homophobia in Nigeria
Homophobia is not new to Nigerians due to a myriad of factors ranging from culture to religion. For years, LGBT people have suffered discrimination and violence due to their sexual orientation and gender identity.
In January 2014, Goodluck Jonathan, the former president of Nigeria passed a bill into law that criminalised any active part in homosexuality in the country. A moment that was praised by so many Nigerians, regardless of their religion, tribe or political affiliations. An article by Hamish McKenzie on the University of Melbourne’s website seeks to know if Nigeria is the most homophobic country on earth; a sentiment shared by many.
Small Win?
Apologies to the global queer community are almost regular; an example is when Pope Francis apologised in 2016 to queer people that had been offended and exploited by the church. In his words; “The Church must ask forgiveness for not behaving many times – when I say the Church, I mean Christians. The Church is holy, we are sinners. I believe that the church not only should apologize to the person who is gay whom it has offended but must also apologize to the poor, to the exploited women, to children exploited for labour. It must ask forgiveness for having blessed many weapons.”
However, this is not the case in Nigeria. Over time, celebrities have thrown queer people under the bus to score cheap points. From Paul Okoye of P-Square to Eedris Abdulkareem’s homophobic rant when he spoke about Bobrisky, homophobia has been a constant of the rhetoric of public figures in Nigeria. So even though Simi’s apology is long overdue, can we count it as a win for the community? Is it worthy of note, that someone with enough social currency, deems it important to apologise to a marginalised group?
But what does an apology mean?
Addressing wrongs is very important especially in a society where information is made easily available and accessible because of social media. An apology like this is an acknowledgement of violence and an offering to a starting point for moving towards a conscious society and perhaps a queerer future for a country like Nigeria.
An apology also opens up opportunities for further action. Giving a sense of visibility, and courage to individuals and community-support organisations towards collective healing. For example, LGBTQ+ organizations in the country can rightfully make strategic use of Simi’s formal apology.
Formal recognition of systemic inequality, and the harms that inequalities produce, provides an important step towards repair. -Thandi Fletcher
People must also take responsibility for their actions that can lead to harm. It means you are telling those that are directly affected by your actions and statements that their experiences are valid. When an apology is made by someone with a large influence in the society, especially when it is hardly done in that society, it shows that there is an improvement in the orientation of individuals in that society.
It also shines a light to all activists, individuals and organisations who are pushing daily to enable a better space for the community in the country that there is recognition for their work. Apologies re-establish dignity for those you hurt. Letting the injured party know that you know it was your fault, not theirs and helps them feel better.
Simi didn’t need to wait for an LGBTQ person to die to realize that she should not indignify or stigmatize an already persecuted and ostracized community. The earlier we all realize that everyone of us has a gay cousin, the better for us.
— Jake Okechukwu Effoduh (@effodu) August 3, 2020
But an apology can only have a positive impact if done properly. It must come with gestures that signify impact. Therefore, action is needed.
Now imagine, if you will, being told that the very country you would willingly lay down your life to defend doesn’t want you. Doesn’t accept you. Sees you as defective. Sees you as a threat to our national security. Not because you can’t do the job, or because you lack patriotism or courage — no, because of who you are as a person, and because of who your sexual partners are. Justin Trudeau – Prime minister of Canada
There are so many ways you and I can take action to push for a better living space for the LGBT+ community in the country.
- Be accountable for your actions: Own your offences. It is not a ‘cancel culture’ when there is growth.
- Do not stereotype: Being gay is not by how you dress, what you wear, or what you look like. It is by individual identification and who you lay down in bed with at night. Do not make assumptions that someone is gay except they tell you themselves. Reflect on the times you’ve treated men as inferior to straight men just because they are effeminate.
- Educate yourself: Queer people have as much of a right to exist in peace as anyone else. Don’t just say it. Believe and defend it.
- Keep your religious beliefs to yourself:Do not approach people with your religious beliefs to make them feel bad. Treat LGBTQ people with the same respect they give to you
- No one owes you an explanation: Just like with everyone else, their lives are none of your business and it is not your place to tell anyone what they are doing wrong or right.
- Never out a member of the LGBTQ+ community to anyone: No one asked you for help, and if they wanted to be known they would ‘come out’ themselves. When you do this you are putting their life in danger.
An apology is an excellent start and the best example of what truly loving your neighbour means. It is important to note that all hate speech should be treated as a precedent for violence. As individuals we must recognize that hearing and repeating hateful speech contributes to the assault and murder of LGBTQ+ people in our society and that is not okay.
To all those who have lived and struggled, and to those who have fought so hard to get our society to this plane of existence: “thank you for your courage, and thank you for lending your voices.”
Enioluwa Adeoluwa is a writer, who specializes in covering fashion and contemporary pop culture. You can follow him on Instagram and Twitter @enioluwaofficial.
The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this Op-Ed by the Writer are theirs alone and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of The Rustin Times.
