I am tired of straight women crying about how they got married to a gay man.
I know you have been done wrong by the universe and a straight man should have found you and made you the wife that God has called you to be but sister I could care less. I mean, there was a time when I used to worry about “innocent women” getting hooked with gay men. I used to go on a rant to any of my friends that would tell me that they were getting married to someone of the opposite sex. I would do my best to convince them to consider the woman and how her life would change drastically. While I have never succeeded in doing that, my time on earth has taught me that these women deserve what they get.
Let us be practical, go on BellaNaija or Linda Ikeji and search for stories that have to do with the LGBT community (whether good or bad). You will notice a trend in the comment section. The Christian Women will come out and be very critical; adding that “God’s judgment is coming for them.” I mean you can go on Instablog9ja and see the foolery these women put out in the name of “preserving the culture.” Their homophobia is the worst and to think that some of them will identify as champions of women’s rights.
Benedicta Freeze, the fiance to controversial OAP Daddy Freeze, did an interview with Linda Ikeji TV were she shared that her ex-husband of 10 years was gay. She added that they had sex 11 times throughout their marriage and that she caught him having sex with another guy in their living room. Now, she made other accusations against him, from domestic violence to endangering the lives of their children and I personally think he should be investigated on those allegations. However, when she shared the part of the “sexual perversion” of her husband, she started crying and to be honest I rolled my eyes.
I am sorry about what happened to Sister Benedicta and no woman deserves to be abused by any man. However, on this marrying a gay man issue, I do not empathise with any woman who has ended up with a gay man. I mean, she (Benedicta) even added that many women are currently married to gay men so I am glad that she even knows it is a reality. Truth is, she is not the only one who talks about this. Many women are on social media complaining of how their husbands trapped them in a marriage that was a sham. I am just tired to hear their wailing. You are not the victim in this position, sister. The times where you could stand with the LGBT community as an ally, what did you do? When these issues are raised in your workplace, do you speak out against hate or do you continue to push ignorant sentiments? How did you react when the Nigerian government criminalised homosexual relations between people of the same sex? Did you give the government a thumbs up or did you speak out?
I am tired of us having to be the bigger people. The ones to educate them on who we are. The ones to tolerate their ignorance. I am tired of us being the ones to rejoice when they say things like “I don’t have anything against gay people oh, just don’t bring it near me.” I refuse to be the bigger person in this conversation. It is 2018 and people need to educate themselves. Times have changed and Google is your best friend. Everything you need to know is right there backed up by scientific research. To this end, I refuse to feel remorse to any woman who finds herself married to a gay man.
This is the society you desire. One were men have to hide who they are because they don’t want to be arrested or worse, killed. You have enabled a society of homophobia because you decided to be passive and not stand in solidarity with the LGBT community. Is this the country you hope to leave behind for your children? What would happen when your son or daughter comes out to you? How would you react? Suicide rates are high in the LGBT community and many talented young people are leaving the country.
We need to do better as a country. Women you need to stand in solidarity with the LGBT community. In the fight for Women’s rights, we are your biggest allies and in this fight, you need to be our allies. Fight for your gay sons and stand up for your lesbian sisters. Speak out against the oppression that is prevalent in the society and maybe you won’t end up with a gay man.
Until then, Save your tears because your homophobia put you in this position.